Handling an Early Pregnancy II

I was 22 years old and about three months or so. I had just completed my third year. In a weeks time I was supposed to begin my industrial attachment. I still didn’t have a place to be attached. Am through with exams and its when am writing my application letters and CV. I did find a place anyway, about two weeks later. After my exams we had met, Mr and I, and you know what.

Two weeks into my industrial attachment I missed my moon. I didn’t see her. It didn’t worry me much since sometimes the cycle misbehaves with a day or two. I carried out the pregnancy test and it turned out negative. A false negative, for hardly three days later it turned out positive. I was tense, glad yet worried. We had been in touch so I gave him a call.

“Hey?” I

“Hello? How was work today?” Mr

“It was good. Fitting into the system slowly.”

“Oh that’s good. By the way, has she showed up yet?” He asked.

“No. That’s why I called. She’s actually fertilized!” I heard him sigh deeply.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. Holy sure.”

“Alright. Mmmh, let me think it through. I’ll get back to you.”

“Alright. Have a good night.”

“Good night baby.”

Oh! I didn’t know what to expect. He didn’t sound upset or angry so I felt optimistic. I had my attachment to handle, the travels of about an hour to and fro daily. The expenses, the fatigue, the needs of the baby. I was so determined. I became more prayerful than before. I prayed for strength. I prayed for my baby. I was so zealous to protect her. I didn’t have a second thought. She had to be supported. The first eight weeks were not troublesome. Although, I really slept at work! Frequent hunger, oh God. My colleagues didn’t bother much anyway.

I talked to my manager secretly. I requested her to at least allow me leave a bit early. She agreed and actually allowed me to be leaving everyday at 4 or 3.30 depending on the activities of the day. I was doing some small hawking back at school in the evenings to sustain myself. It got so tiring and my body refused to cope. I was straining a lot and baby got tired too. She started loosing herself and I was ordered by the doctor to take a total bed rest, till the bleeding ceased. I had to ask for some money from a friend for the medication. Mr sent an eighth of my bill later in the night. I was already at home and had sorted the bill. There are some tablets I didn’t buy actually. Huh

Am 12 weeks old now. Mine wasn’t morning sickness. It shifted to evening sickness. I could throw up heavily in the evenings. She refused food! Especially greens. I took milk, yoghurt and roasted maize. She loved bitter and sour things. I can literally count the days I went to work. God help me!

I have to inform my parents now. I couldn’t call my dad. It could be easy talking to mum first. So I thought to myself. We are now knocking heads with Mr. He says that I meant to trap him. Oh it was intentional. I believe in my anger and agitation I must have made some demands that may have suggested so. Whatever! So he locked up. No calls, no texts no nothing! Yeah.

Charity, was there too. Encouraged me, prayed with me, checked on me and God bless her.

I talked to my cousin Joyce first. She screamed her head off. “Have I not told you before? Couldn’t you have used protection…..” For five minutes then she stopped. “Anyway, what do we say now?” She was of good support. I celebrate you darling.

Hope FM and Radio Maisha became my friends during those two weeks I was on bed rest. I heard a Lady call and say she’s been trusting God for a child for fifteen years into her marriage. That she was still waiting upon the Lord. And I was there, three months pregnant having not asked God for one. Then I thought, that is the irony of life. You are not asking for something it comes. You are waiting for it, it doesn’t come. The two FMs became my companions until they became part of my sickness.

You won’t believe when I came back to school and tuned to Hope FM, I could feel my pregnancy symptoms. I could remember my pains, my discomfort, my tears and they felt like they were the cause of it. I could switch off immediately. 15months down the line! Haha

I gave my mother a call on a Saturday evening. Find out tomorrow how the conversion went
Next epidode tomorrow

##credits @mercypaulo


ŴħA† σ…….

What If

I was a Prince

The Prince of Paradise

Would you make a promise?

That you will not marry anyone else

That I’ll be all that makes sense
What If

I was a billionaire

The only one willing to share

Not only my wealth but my love as we prepare

For our wedding hoping the future will be fair

Our children growing as we stare
What If

I was a soldier 

Fighting in wars which is unhealthier

Sometimes making our love icier

Would you still care for us?

Would you  still love me?


I am sinner

I am a lost sheep

I am a disappointment to you

But you believe in me

You still love me


You give me life

You still give me health

You still cloth me, give me food n water

In your name, I exist

You are powerful


I belive in You

And I want to thank You

And I’m sorry n asks for your mercy

And I seek your guidance

For I repent


Dear God of heaven n earth

Save me n help me be good

For You are the only One who can

I trust in You God

Thank you



You cry day and night
Tears flowing from your chubby cheeks

Your eyes turn red every time you think of him

No eating, bathing or drinking because of him

Him that despised your personality

Him that crushed your desire for love

Him that extinguished your fire for living and happiness

Moses! Moses! Moses!

Let me be your Moses!

Let me save you from the bad blood

Let me fight your ghost

Let me lead you to the future

Future of grace, humility and love

Future of kindness and peace

Future of health and life

Future of waters and Blueberries 

Let me lead you to Canaan even if I won’t be there

Free world of no limits and hate

Make me your Moses!

Letters of Beauty

Forests are green,-green forever, life giver

And just like they are the worlds hope, your love, dear, makes me

O Love O Heart, you are beautiful in all languages but most so in yours

How happy I would be if I could assist you at your undressing

The divine and ravishing firm breasts, the adorable face

The midnight-black hair tied up in a beauteous scarf

With those red rose-leaf lips of yours made for the madness of kissing, kissing and kissing

Living within you is to live in King Solomon’s palace, kisses on your mouth, your eyes, your breasts, everywhere, everywhere

I already love in you your beauty, and your soul

I would like to paint you, but there are no colors that will match you

Because your slim gilt soul and light body walks between passion & poetry

I have read this letter in your garden;-my love, your favorite words

You gave me your grace, your light & your warmth

Funny was that I couldn’t say je t’aime &je t’adore as I longed to do

But always remember that I am saying it, going to sleep with you in my heart

Think of me sometimes, when the Alps & ocean divide us, but they never will unless you wish it

My love, my love , my beauty

Father’s Love

Tall or short, fat or skinny

He is the reason you are you

He is the head of the house

He is the strength & muscles

That is my father, your father


Gold or sheeps, wealth or peasant famer

Bread & meat he brings

Fees & books he brings

Shelter & clothing he brings

That is my father, your father


Young or old, devorced or married

Will scold, beat & punish you

Will be strict & restrict you

Will be argue & disagree with you

That is my father, your father


Healthy or sick, soldier or civillian

His love & care for you is uncomparable

His faith & belief in you is unremovable

His blessings for you is untouchable

That is my father, your father